The Briggs-Rauscher Reaction

06May10

So it wasn’t a date … we were just going to meet up there, which was cool.

But the event’s been cancelled, and rescheduled to a date where I can’t go.

Is it bad that I feel relieved?  That I feel reassured and less nervous now?  I know that I should have been excited by prospect of having a maybe-date with a guy that I could grow to like, but if anything the whole idea of it was more scary than exciting.

I think I worry that I’m going to fall into the same cycle that I did with Chaos — every time I thought things were finalized he’d show back up.  Every time I thought things were finally blue, they became clear again.  It was a vicious cycle that never ended, and it’s not something I want to re-enter.   The fact that it’s a guy who is a co-worker pretty much seals me into a cycle of repeatability.   Which is unacceptable, in my opinion.

History repeats itself, and that’s one of the things that’s wrong with history.” — Clarence Darrow

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One Response to “The Briggs-Rauscher Reaction”

  1. 1 h

    Darrow defended both Leopold & Loeb and John T. Scopes.

    He of all people should have known that history is what you make it.

    Yes. It is bad to feel relieved. It means you aren’t doing something outside of your comfort zone. 😉


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