Content Uniformity

30Dec09

Last night I made an interesting remark to my father and sister:  “you know I’m great at sitting there and seeing how things are with my guy friends and the girls they like and saying ‘okay you like her’ or ‘she likes you’.  But for some reason as soon as a guy becomes someone I like, I lose the ability to decipher any type of flirtation and it seems like my brain becomes completely useless in the understanding of that particular male”.

So I was particularly refreshed that I was able to see S’ motives quite clearly yesterday.

He messaged me asking what man I had lost faith in, and being the smart ass I am I told him it was him.  I covered it up, because that was pretty harsh (though probably accurate on a romantic level) and we resumed talking.  It was okay I guess; he essentially relayed that his car is non-functional, which ruled out the option of me getting a ride.  I offered him a ride to the city for new year’s if he wanted it and the conversation died soon after.  I went to play video games.

Then a funny thing happened — I started to feel a little bad for the guy.  Stuck at home in a small town alone on new year’s?  Should I invite him to the party I am going to?  Should I forgo my plans and be a good friend and spend time with him?  As I jumped and missed the ledge, once again pushing my little poppet into a firepit I contemplated these, but realized it’s not my job to make everyone happy anymore.  He’s an adult, he could ask to come with me if he wanted, or ask me to do something with him.  It’s not my job to rescue the world.

So really, was I surprised last night when I went on to Facebook and saw his status update was about spending a pile of money on attractive girls that night?  Not really no.  Cyclical events and all that jazz.  I can’t be 100% sure that it was aimed towards me, but based on the last week’s worth of events I’d say it might be a safe bet.

My perception being restored I’d say I’m over the hump — figuratively and literally.

Is it progress if a cannibal uses knife and fork?” — Stanislaw Lec

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5 Responses to “Content Uniformity”

  1. 1 h

    Probably a fair assessment of your responsibility vis-a-vis the universe.

    Was happy to hear your date went well! Even if it’s not going to happen, and as long as you don’t string him along, it made me smile that you found a nice guy (wow, old man quips much?). After all the shit you’ve been through, stable might be nice.

    You know, for a change in pace.

    Before you go back to the bad-boy type. 😉

  2. 2 keewt

    I’m just tired of being the one that tries to make everyone happy; it’d be nice if someone tried to do that -for me- for once :p Chaos had been messaging me the last few days, and finally caught up with me today to ask for a ride tonight. Then he’s like ‘well maybe, you’re my last resort so I’m not sure’ … why bother me if you have two other options? So whatever, I’m not going to stress about it. If he gets screwed with no ride, not my problem.

    And yes, though going out with a ‘nice guy’ was interesting I had fun and would likely do it again. And yeah, no stringing him along either I agree. We have loose plans for another date later in the month, so we’ll see.

    And you are old, deal with it. Bwahaha.

  3. 3 h

    Point, the first: you’re older. :p

    • 4 keewt

      Details details, dear h. Besides if we’re talking about the soul, you’re possibly a good decade older than me.

      • 5 h

        I’m sorry, but I can’t help that I have more soul than you. I’m Southern: the Mississippi blues run through my veins.


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